Keeping the Soul in Our Work- Together!
by Patricia Berendsen M.T.S., RMFT
© 2006
Patricia Berendsen, M.T.S., RMFT maintains an active private practice in Individual, Couple and Family Therapy and Clinical Supervision in London, Ontario. Patricia also provides clinical services as a Clinician with the Clinical Supports Program at the Centre for Children and Families in the Justice System of the London Family Court Clinic. Additionally she is an Approved Supervisor with OAMFT/AAMFT. She can be contacted at patricia@patriciaberendsen.com
I had just returned from a meeting, feeling rather discouraged. Yet again, I painfully observed several professionals losing sight of the best interests of clients, because they were too busy “strutting their stuff” and “stroking their egos” in a public forum. Too much time and effort was used to be distinguished as superior; more intellectual, more caring, more dedicated, more research driven, more fiscally responsible… more, more, more. The regrettable result was the silence of other important voices. They would not be able to ‘compete’ with such grandiosity displayed before them. Some group dynamics appear childish, reminiscent of children playing in a sandbox, jockeying for the position of “top dog” and protecting their turf, all the while forgetting that the sandbox is common ground and that they actually like each other! Unfortunately, grandstanding is not an uncommon occurrence and more often than not, makes working together more toxic than productive and life-giving.
How, then, can we keep the soul in our work, TOGETHER?
Allow me to share with you some strategies that have proven to be helpful in promoting cohesiveness, improving morale and all the while, keeping the soul in our work.
1. Check your ego at the door. Coming together and seeking to determine the ‘best interests of the client’ means that we must truly put aside our own agendas. I have participated in meetings and observed professionals approaching situations from a fear based perspective- with the agenda of protecting the agency’s often minimal funding or its status in the community. Although we wouldn’t like to admit it, sometimes, decisions are made, based on the needs of the agency and not the clients.
2. Believe the best in one another. Keeping the soul in our work, means focusing on the positive and the well meaning intentions of others. It can be tempting to notice and highlight weaknesses and be critical of colleagues or community partners, but it is usually not helpful. It only serves to weaken working relationships, fostering a lack of trust. Believing the best in one another can increase our collective power knowing that we are in this together and that together we are stronger.
3. Take your time and stay with the issue long enough to reach a breakthrough. Some people will refer to this as “trusting the process.” I have participated in several agency and community meetings where resolutions to challenges have been difficult to achieve. Over and over again, I have witnessed the ‘process’ at work…but only if the people involved were able to ‘hang in there’ long enough for the outcome to reveal itself. I have found that the most creative and influential solutions seem to come at the point when we would like to give up. This is often the time when someone will throw out a wishful thought or an offhanded comment. Paradoxically, this seemingly flippant comment can get the ball rolling and within minutes a potential solution emerges. And remember, successful process takes time.
4. Compliment efforts. Working within social service settings is difficult enough. We often have to deal with obstacle and are under the watchful eye of funders and supervisors. Taking the time to compliment one another is fuel for more success. When we “catch one another doing good” we are more likely to want to repeat our performance. Genuine compliments create the fertile ground in which strong working relationships can grow.
5. Utilize the diversity and strengths that are brought to the table. Those of us who like being in control may struggle with this point. Teams are eroded when only one or two people do the lion share of the work. It is essential that everyone participates in the solution. Contributing as a group means that the buy-in is greater, more people get on board and everyone can have more ownership not only of the problem, but especially, the solution. Using diversity and strengths allows for skills and abilities that may have been somewhat hidden to come to the forefront. The outcome is often a sense of satisfaction and a realization of competency that contributes to increased confidence for the future.
6. Have fun. Do you ever feel guilty when you are making a raucous during a meeting while other colleagues glance curiously as they pass by the conference room window? Have we bought into the myth that we can only be serious if we are to get our work done? Some of the most productive meetings I have attended did not look like much was getting done from the “outside looking in.” However, what wasn’t noticeable to passersby’s was that deeper relationships were being forged; time was passing by quickly, and all the agenda items were tended to (and more besides). All of us involved looked forward to the next meeting. An atmosphere that lends itself to levity when it presents itself can be inspiring and usually promotes team cohesiveness and a positive working environment.
7. Examine the effectiveness of the project and working relationships. Making time for reflection is crucial. One of the most utilized tenets of solution focused work is to notice what one is doing well and then doing more of it. It also includes analyzing and highlighting what went into a job well done and to ascertain what improvements can be made for the next time. When we have completed a project, we are usually so relieved “to get it over with” that the last thing we are interested in doing is sitting down and evaluating our work. I would argue that reflecting upon and evaluating our work is one of the most cost efficient practices at our disposal. Through evaluation, we can evolve as team players, grow in professional knowledge, and develop closer working relationships and partnerships.
Read More » Comments Off
